Day 11: Endometriosis - a lesson in resilience

Living with a chronic illness is a lesson in resilience. You learn that you cannot change your path, but you can change how you handle it. You learn that it doesn't get easier, you just get stronger. Fighting a battle with your own body is pretty damn exhausting, but you learn that you can heal without being cured. It makes you a warrior. It makes you resilient.

What is resilience? Why is it important? How will you know if you are resilient enough?

Resilience is your capacity to withstand adversities in life, and your ability to grow despite life's downturns. Being resilient doesn't mean that you don't experience stress, suffering, and emotional upheaval. Nor does it mean that you learn to always be happy about the changes in your life. Instead, it means that you are capable of handling the challenges and emerging stronger than you were before.

People who lack resilience find that they may easily become overwhelmed by difficult experiences in life. They tend to dwell on problems, and often resort to unhealthy coping mechanisms like alcoholism or drug abuse in the hopes that they'll be better equipped to face life's challenges. But these dangerous and destructive behaviors only end up pulling them back resulting in disappointment or failure. And this is why people with chronic illnesses are more prone to mental health issues, and often benefit from therapy and mindfulness which help them become more resilient.

Building resilience is a slow and gradual process. You don't wake up one fine morning with rose-tinted lenses to realize that you have become resilient. Instead, you constantly work on improving your abilities across multiple disciplines - finding social support, building your self-esteem, learning coping skills, being able to communicate clearly and effectively, etc.

My path to resilience

Looking back, I see how I was already walking on the path of resilience even before I knew what the term meant. I had started working on my abilities to cope with my trauma even before I had a proper medical diagnosis for endometriosis. That is probably why I have found it easier than most others to handle my condition better, and to make necessary changes to my lifestyle without someone having to convince me to.

I have always been an art aficionado. I find it to be a means of expression, a medium of communication. The different art forms that I have grown a liking to over the years are dance, painting, and writing. Each is unique in its own way and allows me to express my thoughts and emotions however I choose to. I have always loved the fact that I am capable of putting my fears and hurt away while I am dancing. I have found that my writings are a means to get people to read what they otherwise wouldn't be ready to hear me speak. And my paintings allow me to capture the thoughts in my head in a way words cannot. Together, this holy trinity has helped me stay sane in my journey of hunting down and fighting the hidden monster inside me.

There are other habits and activities that I have found to be helpful recently. These let me stay connected with my inner self and find peace in the midst of chaos. Over the last year, I have taken a liking to gardening, and own quite a few plants that really cheer me up even on the dullest day. Practicing yoga and breathing exercises help me clear my head and start the day on a good note. Eating healthy, and making good diet choices go a long way in controlling my mood swings and anxiety. I have found that following a daily timetable helps my body relax, and stay in control. But this is something I am still struggling with and continues to be a work in progress.

Sometimes life gets harder when your illness interferes with your ability to indulge in activities that build your resilience. It is important to always prioritize your health first. On days when your body permits you to, make sure to take full advantage and engage in activities you love. I often find it hard to dance, bike, or go to the gym on days when I wake up with pain. So I try to not make plans in advance, but instead, take it one day at a time. If I am in pain, I choose to stay indoors and keep myself occupied with painting or writing. If I am not, I get outside and enjoy the sunshine while I can. And in my opinion, that's the first lesson to being resilient - learning to walk in the shoes I have without complaints while I struggle beyond my own strength. It is about being brave enough to wake up every morning knowing that I have to fight the same demons that left me tired the night before.

Endometriosis is resilient and it continues to grow. Women with endometriosis are also resilient and we continue to fight.

#EndoTheStigma